Happy 'Smurfday'!!

So, last weekend (yes, it's taken me a week to get around to the blog) we had my son's 4th birthday party.  Since everything in my house is smurf-themed lately, the birthday party was obviously smurf themed as well.  Now, you would THINK that since the Smurf movie came out there would be lots of smurf-themed birthday supplies around.  No.  Nothing.  I looked into ordering from a birthday supplies company that I found on facebook, and it would have been like $80 for a few cups and a table centerpiece, and a couple of foil ballons.  So, I decided that I was gonna have to get creative. 

Now, I'm not a believer in big, extravagant birthday parties.  I'm all about themes, and I like decorations, but all my kids really care about is that their friends come to visit, and that they get birthday cake.  When I asked my son what he wanted for his birthday, all he asked for was a Papa Smurf birthday cake.  Even when we took him to toys 'r' us for a 'birthday shopping spree', he only chose a couple of gifts to bring home (one of which was just a small Lion King plush, and the other which was a Thomas train).  They really don't need much to make them happy!

The party had been planned for Saturday morning, but because of weather we had to postpone it to Sunday afternoon.  Because of the time change, there were some kids that couldnt' make it, so we only had 4 other kids there.  That being said, it was enough.

Decorations

Since smurfs are all over the blue, I had blue and white balloons, blue plates, white table cloth (I didn't get a chance to get a decent picture because I find it so hectic when I'm trying to get everything organized, and because we need a camera-- my phone just doesn't cut it for pictures).  I also painted some smurfs on brown packaging paper and cut them out to put on the wall.  I wish I had pictures of those, because they were awesome, but alas, my unfortunate lack of camera. . . I did 5 of them, they were about the same size as the little smurf plush toys you can get, and when the party was over we put them up in my son's bedroom.  If I'd had more time (which I didn't, because the weather was so horrible), I would have had homemade trees on the wall, with the leaves coming out on the ceiling, etc.  But, it wasn't necessary, my kids both loved the little smurfs and the balloons.

Food

So, again, blue is the theme.  I had some blue candy, I had yogurt and "smurfberries" (just some mixed berries), and birthday cake.  I had originally planned to have 'smurfberry' pancakes and to make smurf-house cupcakes, but because of the timechange, it just didn't fit the same. 

The cake was made by Glynnis Kennedy --- Kennedy cakes.  It was seriously one of the most delicious cakes I've ever had. . . I also just told her that we wanted something Papa Smurf, and she came up with this.  I was so impressed.  I would definitely recommend her!

Games

So, since my boy was turning 4, I chose some games that 4 years olds could have fun with.  I figured that we could play freeze dance, smurf tag, etc.  Once we got to the party, however, they weren't interested, haha.  My boys and their friends had decided that they would just prefer to use their imaginations and pretend that they were smurfs and play on their own.  In my opinion, more power to them!  My kids really love to play pretend, and they rarely get to do that with a friend here.  I just let them go nuts.

Party Favours

So, I didn't go with the traditional loot bag for this party.  I had considered it, and then decided I wasn't interested in spending money on garbage.  Instead, I decided to make smurf hats.  The birthday  boy wanted a red one so he could be papa smurf, and I made white ones for the rest of the kids.  I bought some felt and an old pillow, got out my sewing machine (which I had never used up to this point, so I had to spend an hour looking up how to use it), and went to town designing and making smurf hats.  I used the batting from the pillow to stuff the tips, and they turned out great.  Each kid got to take home a smurf hat, and I had 2 smurf charms each for them (that I had ordered from somebody that I had found on facebook). 

Kids eating their yogurt and wearing their smurf hats.

My kids have been sleeping, playing, eating, and just plain living in those smurf hats since I made them.  They were well worth it!

Overall, the party was a success in the eyes of my kids.  For me?  I always look back and think of how I could have made things better and do things differently. . . so I'm not completely satisfied.  I can't help but imagine a perfect world where I have unlimited resources and time.  Unrealistic?  I do realize that, but I guess that's just who I am.  My mind is already reeling trying to figure out what I'm going to do for the next birthday party, coming up in April. . . 



Options

So, I am experiencing a dilemma of sorts in my life.  I love working, and more specifically I love teaching.  The problem, however, is that the province in which I live is glutted with teachers and there are no jobs for people like me, who are not able to just up and move to the remote communities to 'get my foot in the door'.  So, I am here, with a 3 (almost 4) year old and a 2 1/2 year old, trying to figure out what to do with myself.

There are lots of things that I enjoy to do, lots of jobs that I could probably work at and enjoy.  The problem, is that there are a number of problems with me doing this.  Number one, I don't want to just 'work a job', I want a career.  Something I can build and work on, some field in which I can gain experience and expertise that will move me forward and better my abilities.  For me, with my training, that would be the education field.  I am, however, hoping to do a masters program in counselling psychology.  This would give me a leg up in the education system in our province, but would also leave a number of doors outside of the education system wide open for me.  It does, however, take time to complete this.  Not to mention actually getting into the program.

The second problem is childcare.  This is something I often complain about, and I'm sure you'll read about in the future.  Childcare for me would cost at least 300-400 dollars A WEEK.  That means 600-800 dollars bi-weekly.  In order to justify me leaving the house and paying childcare in order to work, I would have to take home (after taxes and whatnot) at least 1500 dollars bi-weekly.  I cannot justify putting my children in childcare and going outside of the house to work unless I'm actually making some money after it's all said and done.  Finding a job that pays that much is not just improbably, but nearly impossible.  That being said, right now I am able to receive employment insurance benefits, because we moved for my husbands job and my contract in my previous position was up.  When that is out, I have to figure something out.  We just can't survive on one income these days. 

So, what are my options?  Obviously I can't just stay home and take care of my kids until they hit school-age.  Though, it's pointless for me to go out and get a "job" as well, since I won't be making enough money to justify it.  I can go back to school, but that's going to take a while to finish and I need to make some money while I'm doing that.  We can't really move for a job, because my husband just started this really great job that he loves and that can be really beneficial for us.  So what does that leave me with?

I guess I can take kids into my home and provide childcare for other children, as well as my own.  Even then, with my two, if I take two more children, I'm still only making about 600 every two weeks, plus having to spend extra on groceries for snacks and lunches.  It's not a huge amount of money, but it is a help.  It is an option.

I would love to be able to start up my own sort of stay-at-home business, but I really don't have any ideas for one.  Cake decorators are a dime a dozen (and I'm not sure I'd be able to do that well), there are photographers everywhere you turn these days (and I'm not sure I'd really enjoy that).  I'd love to make things to sell, or to plan things like birthday parties and baby showers, but I'm not sure how much demand there really is for that around here.  I just don't know what my options are for this.  I guess, as well, I'm not really sure what my abilities and skills are, or if I even have anything to offer anybody. 

I tend to think that I'm not alone in these problems.  I can't imagine that there are many people that can afford childcare at the prices that are being charged.  And I can't imagine that these people find it any easier to live on one income than we do.  It's nearly impossible to have children and to financially survive these days, unless you have two solid incomes coming in, and perhaps some family around to fill childcare gaps. 

I'm sure we'll figure everything out, and maybe I'll come up with something to do at home.  For now, though, I'm at a crossroads.

Potty Training, take 2

Ok, so I'm the worst blogger in the history of bloggers.  I do realize that I will never have followers when writing like this.  In my defense, it's really hard to find time to sit, think, and put together sentences that make me sound like I have a working brain.  That being said, I think it just might help me to feel a little productive in the run of a week, though I'm not quite sure why.

So, the last time I checked in we were in the process of potty training child number 1.  I am happy to say that child number 1 is not fully potty trained, and even goes through the night without accidents.  I know, you would hope that he would be after this long.  He's great at using the potty, and is even beginning to wipe his own bum.  That's the good news.  The bad news, is that we still have to go through this again, with another (more stubborn) child.  We started with child number 2 before Christmas, probably about 2 months ago now.  He was definitely ready, and started asking to use the potty.  The child has since decided, however, that using the potty is too much work and that it's really rather funny to pee and poop on the floor.  Two months later, and we are still trying to get him to use the potty properly.

Now, I know that some of you are thinking, "Just keep at it, he'll get the hang of it eventually", and others are thinking, "He's just obviously not ready yet, give it a couple of months".  My problem is that I am torn between the two viewpoints.  The stubborn part of me refuses to give up, and the rational part of me just thinks that in a few months he might be ready.  The thing is, I'm very ready to stop wasting my money on pull-ups and diapers and whatnot.  I'm very ready to be free of all of it. 

On top of that, we have taken the bedtime bottle away from child #2.  This is another horrific experience as a parent.  The child has a complete meltdown every night before bed.  We had to take it away, because he was waking up several times throughout the night for a refill of the bottle.  Plus, he's almost 3 years old, and is MORE than old enough to be giving it up.  I think in order to understand how dramatic the reaction is, I think you'd have to know the child and see how stubborn and strong-willed he is.  It's 30-45 minutes of pure torture at bedtime.  On the bright side, when he FINALLY goes to sleep, he sleeps so much better than before!  So, totally worth it. 

On the happy side of parenting, my oldest child turns 4 in a week!  So, I'm planning a smurftastic birthday party for him!  I had looked at ordering all of the supplies, but then decided to make it all myself.  I'll take some pictures and blog about the party when it's done (I know, you're thinking 'yeah, right').

I feel like I have a whole lot of blogs brewing in my head, so there are a number of topics you can look forward to me writing about.  These include:  smurfy birthday party ideas;  childcare;  and several about being a stay-at-home-mom.  These have been brewing for a while, so you can expect some pretty opinionated stuff in these blogs.

The Joys of Potty Training

Why do we use toilets?

I started potty training this summer, and have asked myself that question more times than I can count.  Why can't we all just wear diapers and save ourselves the time and effort?  I am at my wits end with trying to teach my 3 year old to use the potty.

I started over the summer, and it was going really well.  I used the rewards chart (that I made myself), I patiently put him on the potty every 30 mintues and cleaned up pee and poop from the floor all day long.  I encouraged and spun everything positively. . . and then it happened.  He started to go to the potty on his own, we went days at a time without accidents. . . for the most part, he was potty trained.  The only time we had accidents was if he couldn't make it to the potty in time, or if he couldn't find a bathroom.  Even on our across-province trip, we made it without any accidents.

Now, 3 months later, I'm finding him hiding in corners to pee and poop.  I am again cleaning pee and poop up off the floor, the toilet seat, etc.  I am completely out of ideas as to how to handle this.  I've tried the advice I've read from all of the 'experts', telling me to clean it up matter-of-factly and not punish him, but to encourage him and remind him to use the potty.  However, this is not working.  It's embarrassing, because we hired a sitter and told her that he was mostly potty trained, but he's had an accident nearly every day since he's been there!  I'm out of patience. 

I think the most frustrating this is that my child is very intelligent.  I know that a lot of mothers' say that about their children, and think their children are so smart and handsome and perfect.  I, however, do not have perfect child syndrome.  I can admit the faults of my children, however I am proud of their strengths.  My child is very smart, always has been.  I KNOW that he knows the difference.  He will even sometimes do it just for spite, if we put him in time-out for example.  I feel like it's just about him showing us that he can and will pee and poop wherever he wants to.  How do I even BEGIN to deal with this. 

Maybe we'll just become a family that uses diapers. . .

I'm back. . . for now!

So, having a consistent blogging lifestyle is obviously not a thing I'm good at. However, with the kids getting older and more independant, I find myself having more time on my hands to do some reading and writing, and other activities I enjoy that don't require leaving the house or leaving them 'unsupervised'. I have also found myself craving a writing outlet, somewhere to write about both the mundane and important events in my life. And so, I find myself reviving my old blog, renaming it, and giving it a go once again.

Needless to say, a lot has happened since 2009, my last blogpost. I continued to work in the same school until June of this year (2011). In May, we moved our family to another community, as my husband was requested to make the move by his boss. For a full month I stayed with a friend while my family was living 4 hours away. It was torture, and quite depressing! But we survived it.

Over the summer my husband was noticing some pretty gross things happening at his work, things that were both unethical AND bordering illegal, and so he decided to leave. He now has a new job that makes him very happy, and now I am the one doing the job hunting. It seems like we aren't meant to both hold down permanent jobs at the same time.

While we are loving our move, and we are very happy with our decision with regards to Brad's work, we have continued to face issues. The first being childcare. It's crazy how much people are charging for childcare! For us to have both of our children with a childcare provider, the cost range that we have found is from 1200-1500 dollars a month! And some of these people are just working out of their homes and taking in like 5-6 kids! Needless to say, I think I've gone into the wrong educational field. I should have spent less time in school and done an ECE diploma. I could have easily had a job, and I could have done WELL. On top of it, I wouldn't have to wonder what to do with my kids when I'm working. But, it is what it is. I am what I am. Luckily, we lucked into a young mom a couple of streets down who would take the boys for the same as what we were paying at our previous sitter, and she is flexible about the days (will do part time or full time). Hopefully I'll get LOTS of working days and we'll make good use of her. We'll see!

kid obsession

So, something that I've noticed since I've had children is that you become OBSESSED with everything child. Everywhere I go, everything I do, I always for some reason relate it back to my children. I would feel extremely weird and guilty about that, but it seems that other mothers experience the same phenomenon.

What happened for me to become so aware of this in my life? I had a weekend in which I actually got OUT of the house without children to SOCIALIZE (I know. . . I actually had time to socialize! It's an amazing thing. . .). Anyhow, they had a double baby shower on Friday night for two of the teachers on staff (one had her baby 6 weeks ago, and the other is due in January). So, I left the boys home with Brad and went out to the shower. I don't know if the fact that it was a baby shower, and so sort of ABOUT babies to begin with, aggravated the situation, but I spent the WHOLE night thinking about my babies and we spent a LOT of time talking about out children and our experiences with them.

Anyways, that's my story. Not a lot of point, sort of a 'so what?' blog, but that's my recent revelation so I thought I'd blog it.

On another note, the Olympic flag passed through our town on Saturday night. We tried to take our oldest baby to see it, but he wasn't that cooperative about it. My husband ended up having to take him home, so I had to see the flame alone. Well, not really alone, I was with friends, but without my husband and baby :( It was really anti-climatic. I was so excited about actually seeing the flame, but it came through later than I had thought, so I was frozen. Not to mention that the people on the field seemed REALLY unenthusiastic about it. I was really surprised that there wasn't more energy and excitement there. Anyhow, at least now I can say that I saw it, and I can tell Isaac and Andrew about it when they get older. I have to say, I'm excited about the olympics this year. YAY 2010!!

hermit. . .

Yes, I have become a cyber hermit. Meaning, I have somehow found myself a recluse from the world of internet. I do manage to check facebook every so often, however I find myself going days without managing to log on. Twitter has become a non-existant part of my life, as has this blog, it seems.

There are several thing that have contributed to my hermitism (is that a word, haha). First off, I don't think that women who have 2 babies under 2 are meant to be able to work, take care of house and family, and also have a internet life. Add that to a husband who is often away working and taking the computer with him, and that leaves close to NO opportunities to participate in the world of online connections.

It feels very strange, to be honest. Since the internet has become commonplace (since sr. high or so for me, I guess), I have NEVER NOT been able to be involved in the community. Whether it be MSN messenger, email, online gaming, etc etc, I've always had access and the ability to get online and be "a part of the world". When I can't do that, I always feel like I'm "out of the loop" so to speak. . . as if there's this whole world there and I'm missing it, as if everyone else has a secret club that I keep missing the meetings for, and so I have no idea what's going on. Since I'm not much of a "people person", and I don't really have time for friends at the moment, the internet is really my only connection to the world outside of the school and my house. So I guess my feelings are justified, since I am "out of the loop" in life.

When we moved into this community, I had originally been really excited. We have friends here, there are a lot of young couples in the church, we have friends in communities nearby. . . then I started work and life started. Since I started work, I don't think that we've really "hung out" with anybody. This weekend, for example, I got home from work at about 2:30 Friday afternoon. It is now 9:45 on Sunday morning and I have yet to step foot outside of the house. Between nursing a sick child and trying to catch up on housework (which I have decided is a futile endeavor) and trying to get some correcting done, my time has been monopolized. There is no space for a social life right this moment.

I laugh when people say "but Lesley, you need to make sure that you make time for yourself. You come first" because it's a pile of . . . um . . . baloney. If I were to make time for myself and leave my sick child at home, or have a dirty house, or have work half finished, then I'd be selfish, lazy, dirty, etc etc. I don't mind not having time to myself right now, because I know that I'll do SOMETHING for myself down the road. But I certainly don't need people to pressure me to make MYSELF a priority when I'm already working hard at getting all of my other priorities done.

Now, after saying all of that, I probably sound extremely unhappy. I'm not. I'm actually fairly content with my life at this point. Aside from the obvious darkness that settled in when my father died (which will never go away), everything else is fairly good. I enjoy my boys. I find coming home after a stressful day in school, my boys make the stress fizzle away. They take me to the happiest, most contented place that exists for me. I don't mind if being a working mom means that I don't get to do things for myself, I'd rather not sacrifice the little time that I get to spend with the boys now to do things for me anyhow. The thought of a 'weekend away' without the boys is not appealing to me. I hardly see them during the week as it is, the weekend is when I get to spend what little time I can with them! As for my lack on internet time. . . some of that is my own fault. The time I DO get on the internet I usually spend catching up on my stalking of people. By the time I check my 2 email accounts (3 sometimes), get on facebook and check my messages and stalk my friends, I have spent a good 1/2 hour (sometimes more) and there is something urgent that needs my attention (for example, yesterday Isaac got into the food colouring and it was all over him. . . can't write a blog while that's happening!).

Anyhow, basically, this is why I have been non-existent. . . I have become a recluse, totally enveloped in the world of my babies and my classroom. Perhaps I'll make more effort to MAKE time for my blog. However, I wouldn't hold my breath on a new entry every day :)